Have you ever wished you could change some aspect of yourself? It's probably true that most of us would like to change something or other or even change somebody else! Well, if we make the choice, and have the commitment, there is a lot we can certainly change for ourselves, but there are other aspects that are immutable.
Hair colour, a nose job, our accent, certainly our posture can change beyond most people's expectations, but so too our actions and our behaviour. We can make changes for health, some others for vanity or simply for the sake of a change, or to enhance our chances in the world. All these changes are fine in their own way and no doubt can be justified. But let's look at a deeper level. What about 'who we are'?
Who we are, is something that we cannot really see or determine. If we look into some-one's eyes however, we consciously and subconsciously pick up a great deal about that person; indeed the eyes are said to be the window of the soul. Those who have had the fortune to meet a gorilla say that the experience is very profound. When a gorilla looks us in the eye, it actually feels as though he is looking right inside us. This is a deeply moving and unnerving experience as he gives the impression of seeing right through our armour, through our defences, through to the very core of our being. It’s a look that can crumble the strongest man or bravest woman. What is it that we think he is seeing, that can wither us so? He’s not admiring the colour of our eyes, or maybe he is…. In some respects it doesn’t concern us what he can see, curious and enlightening as it may be. However, it is interesting to consider what we think he can see. It’s as though he knows us better than we know ourselves. It’s as though he can sense exactly what and who we are, what makes us tick, what are our insecurities, fears, doubts, thoughts and feelings. He just knows.
When a gorilla looks us in the eye, he’s getting close to seeing what we aught to know about ourselves. Our self knowledge is indeterminable. We may think we know ourselves….after all, we’ve been in our own company for quite some time. But so much of life has involved us reacting to situations and making the most of things, playing and having fun as a youngster and plain battling with life’s circumstances as we’ve got older. We’re not aware of ourselves but just coping with life. Sometimes when we’re confronted by a situation or forced to face ourselves in the mirror we can just simply not like what we see. “I wish I was different!” Then we turn away again to get on with the practical issues of the day.
We can all find things about ourselves that we may want to change, and there are many practical things we can do to help. We can see a health specialist, take up sport, have a make over, learn the Alexander Technique, go to the hairdressers and go on a diet, learn to drive and speak a foreign language. There are lots of ways that we can enhance ourselves and our experience in life. However there is something deeper down and so fundamental to our existence that we will not change, and nor should we because the essence of ourselves is just perfect as it is, making us wonderfully unique and individual. If there’s anything imperfect in our lives, it’s not ‘us’ per se, it’s not who we are, but what we do or the way we behave or perform.
If we get down to the deepest chore of ourselves, we find something that is pure. It's pure love. If we get to the deepest chore of the most hardened criminal, rapist or murder, we will find that they too are pure love. It's my belief that there are no bad people in this world, only some people who do bad things. What people do or how they behave, is not 'who they are'. Who we are, in our genetic make up is unchanged from the beautiful baby that made our parents' heart leap for joy at their first sight of us coming from the womb. Even if we are handicapped from birth, we are still made of perfect love. It's the law of attraction. Everything in the universe is held together by energy: molecules electro-magnetically bound together. Everything is energy. The law of attraction brings things together and this is love and this is what we all are at our deepest level.
If we were able to look into our soul or an-other's soul, just as a gorilla may appear to do on catching our gaze, we will find the most beautiful person. This is who you are. This is what we can let others see in us if we let them. Opening the emotional door can be daunting and may even expose issues that need to be addressed. We may have tears, we may need some guidance or help, but there is one thing that's certain in my mind. You are the most beautiful person, a person who everyone would love to meet, to share time with, work with, love with and play with.
Our depth is untold and no matter how open we are, already giving and loving, there is more to be discovered. And you know what? These are qualities that we never run out of. Indeed, the more we give the more we get back.
Who we are is not something we should want to change. Don't even think about it! You know, you are totally awesome! Even though you and I may not have met, I know this about you. And who you are, if I could see into your soul, I know that you are somebody I would love to meet. And so would everyone else.
Have a great day.